07
Feb
09

Tw-it, to who? Find out when the Womaninblack has a bath – FIRST!

I have finally bowed to overwhelming pressure (THREE people asked me to join Twitter! One of whom I actually like!) and have joined the Twitter revolution.

Hes a Twit - will you love my old Twit as much as he does?

He's a Twit - will you love my old Twit as much as he does?

As regular readers (me, Mum and my harem, who are contractually obliged to ‘up’ my view count on a daily basis) will know, I would never willingly limit myself to 140 characters on the basis that, like a blogging version of John Lewis, I am never knowingly underwritten.

I was born with three skills: the ability to make packed lunches in the dark, the ability to become invisible while waiting to be served at bars and the ability to write an inordinate amount of nonsense about any given subject. The latter ability has opened many doors, notably the one to the office where I work.

So, this is a new challenge. Being succinct. But look! I just did it! Right there! By God I’ll have this ‘Twitter’ licked in no time.

Thus far, I have three whole followers, only one of whom is a relative (although we’re all 51st cousins at the very least, which means that if I need an organ, I’m coming knocking at all of your doors). These lucky people  – and YOU if you join us – can find out the following information:

* When I have a bath

* When someone annoys me and I’m too scared to say anything to their face because I’m a coward

* When I have a communicable disease, like Scarlet Fever, bubonic plague or bird flu

* And much, much more! (Christ, I’ve run out of ideas already)

So if you just can’t get enough of me, and let’s face it, who can? Join me and join the fun. At the very least, join me and experience my discomfort at being totally unable to write long, rambling sentences which just run on and on and on and on and which use lots of commas and semi-colons and dashes because my Dad was an English teacher and taught me punctuation before I knew how to ride a bike – although he also taught me to ride a bike, don’t get me wrong – so that you can witness my struggle at first-hand.

On an entirely different note, I seem to have gained an extra child for the night. Let the sleepover hell commence.

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10 Responses to “Tw-it, to who? Find out when the Womaninblack has a bath – FIRST!”


  1. February 7, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    Twitter? OMG…LMAO…what are you doing…ROTFLMAO….work sucks….have you seen Gran Torino…burnt toast sux….LMAO again….rain sux….r u awake….OMG….sting is gay….LMAO 3x….music sucks…..bye.

  2. February 7, 2009 at 9:40 pm

    I’m under the impression that Twitter is basically an unpersonalized text message. I refuse to find out what it actually is and how it works, because I find it incredibly lame. No offense!

  3. February 7, 2009 at 10:49 pm

    Hang on Tannerleah, Sting is GAY? I’m Twittering that right now.

    So…the feeling is that Twitters are actually Twatters. Hmmm. Perhaps I’ll be better at this than I thought I’d be.

  4. February 7, 2009 at 11:55 pm

    I’m kind of with Ummmmheyyyy on this one. Still love you though. Just a little less…

  5. February 7, 2009 at 11:58 pm

    I find Twitter very useful when I have something to say, but it’s not worthy of a proper blog post.

    Consider yourself stalked followed

  6. 6 brucehood
    February 8, 2009 at 1:46 pm

    yes, I succumbed because frankly I am a bit pervy and want to know what Wossy and Fry are up to and they are perfectly willing to share their glamourous lives with the legions of non-entities that believe they have an intimate connection with celebrities.
    Twitter is all about action. What are you actually doing?? Which bodily function are you satisfying? I want to know this instant. Blogging is about what you are thinking. Personally I can’t wait for full frontal video surveillance so I can see how interesting other people’s lives are! Frankly it sounds a bit like dogging… or so I am told!

  7. February 8, 2009 at 2:32 pm

    I think you have to be a nosy, intrusive gossip to truly appreciate Twitter. I am Olympic standard at all of the above, and therefore news that my friend is about to sit on the sofa is, as Bruce says, genuine voyeurism at its best.
    And I used to fancy him when I was 15 – at which point knowing exactly what he was up to all day every day would have aided my stalking no end.

  8. February 9, 2009 at 3:48 am

    shouldn’t that be to “whoM?”

    • February 9, 2009 at 4:58 pm

      Gryph, you’re right. But after so much criticism from my readers across the pond about how I throw in too many extra vowels, I thought I’d leave out a consonant to redress the balance somewhat.

      I so didn’t. I just didn’t think of ‘whom’. You rule.

  9. February 9, 2009 at 6:23 pm

    PS One of my pet hates…the insult wiped away by ‘no offence’ as seen below (and above):

    I’m under the impression that Twitter is basically an unpersonalized text message. I refuse to find out what it actually is and how it works, because I find it incredibly lame. No offense!

    I was offended.


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